- On average, unmarried couples move in together 13 months into a relationship.
- The biggest source of friction for newly cohabiting couples is a need for their own space.
- 1 in 10 admit that they’d moved in with a partner sooner than they’d wanted to – and regretted it.
- Interactive map shows how premature cohabitation stats differ across the U.S.
Moving in with a loved one is usually a pretty major decision; yes, it will be great to be able to spend more time together, but this has to be weighed up against what they’re actually like as a living companion – are they messy? Or the complete opposite, and likely to bug you about a ring made by a coffee cup on a table, Monica-from-Friends style? While many people take the plunge after taking a significant amount of time to get to know each other, sometimes other factors can influence the arrangement…
Yes, money. Headlines have screamed that the cost of living is increasing at its fastest rate for 10 years, and it’s no secret that rent magically becomes cheaper if it’s split between two people. So, to find out if finances are a factor on American couples moving in with each other sooner than they might have otherwise, leading mattress review website Mattress Clarity surveyed 2,000 of them…
Interestingly, Mattress Clarity found that over half – 55% – of cohabiting couples in Montana moved in together sooner than they had initially intended to, mostly for financial reasons. It appears that Bay Staters are the most eager to save on living costs, as a significant two-thirds of co-habiting couples in Massachusetts admit to having moved in with their partner earlier than they would have liked to save on living expenses. But perhaps this isn’t too surprising, as Massachusetts is home to some of the most expensive living costs, with Boston regularly topping the list of priciest spots to live in the U.S.
However, the couples least most likely to cohabit for love rather than financial reasons are those from South Dakota. Whether it’s because South Dakotan couples are more mindful of the risk of relationship break-ups, or the significantly lower rent prices there, only 4.4% of them move in with their partner early to save money. To find out how your state compares, check out the infographic map: https://www.mattressclarity.com/blog/premature-cohabitation-statistics/ (click on ‘embed’ to host).
Mattress Clarity also probed couples to find out what it’s like to move in with each other. They found that one in ten Americans admitted that they’d moved in with a partner sooner than they’d wanted to – and regretted it! So, while the prospect of a little extra cash in your pocket is tempting, you do need to weigh this up with whether your soul-mate is also the ideal room-mate. The survey also found that 81% of Americans believe that rent and bills should be split down the middle, 50-50. However, this can cause friction if, or when, one partner earns considerably more – or less – than the other…
When asked what is the biggest source of friction for newly cohabiting couples, the results were as follows:
- Needing your own space came top of the list, with 30.3% of them saying it was an issue.
- This was followed by cleanliness (24.8%), especially if one person has different expectations than the other!
- Money (13.4%)
- Not having enough storage for two people (13.1%)
- Sleeping habits (10.7%) – snoring must be a pretty big one;
- Eating habits (7.7%) – it’s hard to keep loving someone who chews noisily or eats with their mouth open, for example.
While habits change over time, couples surveyed revealed how the jobs were shared out around the home when they first moved in together. A whopping 80% of women did most of the laundry, 44% of men did the most of the cooking, and 68% of women took on the task of doing the most cleaning.
Often when you move in with a partner, you might see your friends less as a result, as over half of cohabiting couples admit (59.5%). But it’s important not to neglect friendships – after all, who are you going to moan about your messy partner to? Setting aside time to see friends is just as healthy after you moved in together as it was before, if not more so. And it’s even more important to make quality time for your partner, and go on date nights. It’s easy to take someone for granted if they’re there all the time, but a significant 73% of Americans admit they’re not happy with the amount of date nights they get with their significant other since moving in together. All that aside, three quarters of couples say cohabiting actually strengthens the relationship.
So, when is the right time to move in together? Well, the survey found that on average, Americans move in with their partner 13 months into the relationship.